For most of my life I was a vile and disgusting creature. That’s not an overstatement. I look back on my life now and I can’t figure out how I became that person. It confuses me. I think of the things I have done and can’t imagine even considering those things. They range from theft and violence, robbery and attempted murder, deception to sexual immorality, blasphemy to outright attack against God. (At one point which lasted about 5-7 years I read the Bible with the express purpose of using it against Christians, pointing out all the violence and death and rape and inconsistency I found, using my own understanding to manipulate the Word against Christians who would try to talk to me about God) So as I view my life from a new perspective as a reborn man, I see so many of the wildly sinful things I was doing. The terribly flawed logic I was using to read and understand things. It wasn’t until I truly sought God that I could see the Bible for what it was, in its totality, not just sporadic verses which read alone can say something they aren’t meant to say. It has taken me more than 30 years to come to a place where I can understand and love Yahweh for who He is. My Father. My friend. My savior. My only hope in this fallen world. So now I desire only to please Him, to help others see Him for who He really is, to show them the love that He has for us. He is not angry when we miss the mark. (SIN) In the book of Jeremiah it is clear that He desires only our hearts. Our obedience will come through our love, as it covers a multitude of sins. It is only when we reject Him that he is truly hurt by the things we do. He wants only the best for us, and too often we think that what is best is complete freedom to do anything our hearts desire, but the heart is deceitful above all else, and like our earthly fathers, He knows what is actually good for us and desires only beneficial things in our walk on this Earth. We must come to understand that He does love us, and through that love we can come to know Him deeply and personally, finding joy in His presence and comfort in His embrace. My mission here is to tell the stories of my life which reveal God’s presence and protection, His love and mercy, His grace and forgiveness. Our Father is always with us, even when we are suffering, when we are hurting, and when it seems He is not there. If you wait and seek diligently, you will see Him. You will feel Him. He is there. Always and forever.